


switcheroo

by lileolily



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff and Crack, Harry Potter is a Little Shit, Hermione Granger is a Good Friend, M/M, Minor Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley, Possessive Voldemort (Harry Potter), Ron Weasley is a Good Friend, Sane Voldemort (Harry Potter), Soulmate-Identifying Marks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-07
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-13 07:27:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29897652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lileolily/pseuds/lileolily
Summary: When the younger of a pair of soulmates turns fifteen, they both wake up in the other’s body for a day, and can only switch back after 24 hours or whenever they touch, whichever comes first.
Relationships: Harry Potter/Tom Riddle, Harry Potter/Tom Riddle | Voldemort, Harry Potter/Voldemort
Comments: 15
Kudos: 268
Collections: Harry Potter and TMR





	switcheroo

It’s the night before his fifteenth birthday and Harry is having a very difficult time falling asleep. You see, Ron and Hermione have explained to him about soulmates before. Their body-swap on Ron’s birthday didn’t even come as a surprise, at least not to Harry. 

But, now it’s Harry’s turn. Maybe. Who knows? Maybe his soulmate is younger than him, and the he has to wait for them to turn fifteen before the swap. Apparently that’s what happened with his parents. Sometimes there are significant age-gaps and people wait years to swap. He really hopes that he’ll experience the swap in the morning, and that he won’t have to wait. He stares around his room in Grimmauld place, listening to the comforting sounds of Kreacher muttering about mudbloods and Sirius singing along to the wireless in the kitchen.

Suddenly he gets the bright idea that he should have cleaned, and groans. Merlin, what if his soulmate thinks that he’s a slob? Before he can get out of bed and do anything though, he finds himself reluctantly drifting off to sleep.

* * *

Voldemort blinks open his eyes slowly to stare at an unfamiliar ceiling in confusion. It’s blurry. Strange. He sits up and looks to the bedside table to see a pair of hauntingly familiar glasses and an equally familiar wand that are definitely not his. Reluctantly, he puts on the glasses and is rewarded by being able to see the room that he’s in. It has a familiar feel to it, but he can’t pinpoint why. 

He gets out of the bed and pulls on the clothes that are sitting on the trunk at the foot of it, then makes the bed. Looking around again he spots a locket sitting on a dusty shelf, then grabs it with a snarl. How in the world did his horcrux end up in a Townhouse? He tucks it into his pocket and then picks up the wand and stares at it, starting at the strange sensation of rightness he feels from holding a wand that isn’t his own. His scrutiny is interrupted by a knock on the door.

“Harry? You in there?” Voldemort freezes, recognizing the voice — a Weasley of all people — to his horror.

“Or is it your soulmate?” the voice continues. Voldemort groans.

“Soulmate,” he manages to growl out after a pause. Of fucking course it’s the Golden-Boy, who else would Fate see fit to pair him with? There’s silence from the other side of the door, and then, “MIONE! COME HERE!” the sound of a pair of feet hurrying away from the door, and moments later two pairs of footsteps returning. There’s another sharp knock, and then a different voice.

“May we come in?” a girl’s voice — Hermione, then — says. Voldemort sighs, and uses wandless magic to open the door, which swings open to show the youngest male Weasley and the…muggleborn girl. Since the Dark Lord and Harry Potter are apparently soulmates, he’s going to have to at least respect the boy’s closest friends. They walk in and jump onto the bed that he’s just made. Before he can close the door, three more redheads burst in. Rude.

“Ickle Harrikins has a soulmate then?”

“Lucky bastard, getting an older one,” two of them, the identical twins, say in quick succession. The girl looks at him curiously. Voldemort snorts. Yes, older is one word for it. He’s only about six decades older than Potter — Harry — right?

“So, what’s your name then?” the redhead girl asks, tilting her head to the side as she studies him. Something about her is awfully familiar. It clicks, then. She’s the girl — Ginny? Ginevra? — whose life force his horcrux tried to take a couple of years ago.

“I would prefer speaking with Harry before I tell you. There is a possibility that he would want to keep it quiet,” Voldemort drawls through Harry’s mouth. It’s strange to have a different set of vocal cords. The second youngest redhead — Ronald, if he remembers correctly — grins widely.

“Harry tells us everything, Harry’s soulmate. At least give us some clues so we can figure it out ourselves,” the boy says as the other four nod in agreement. Voldemort resists the urge to sigh again.

“I will put it this way — the nature of our soulbond would be quite concerning to many people,” he says, fighting back a grimace. There’s a few confused expressions from the Gryffindors around him. 

“At least tell us your gender, and maybe your age,” Ronald says with a pout. Voldemort wants to ignore him. Then he inhales sharply as his brain finally catches up to his awakened state, and he realizes that Harry Potter is going to wake up in the middle of Malfoy Manor, and he’s supposed to hold a meeting today, and this is not good at all.

“Merlin, it’s going to be an absolute nightmare to make sure that nobody end up dead,” he growls out suddenly, ignoring the alarm on the student’s faces as he magics the door shut and does a bit of wandless magic to set up a privacy ward and a secrecy spell.

“There’s only two other people I can think of right now that can do wandless magic apart from Harry, and I really don’t think that you’re Dumbledore,” Hermione says slowly, eyes narrowed. Voldemort smirks at her. He can see why Harry keeps her around.

“YOU!” Ginny shrieks, jumping off of the bed and backing up. She grabs onto a broom leaning against the wall and holds it up like a bat, to the confusion of her brothers and friend.

“I’ve only ever met one person who can smirk like that, and that’s Riddle,” she snarls out. Voldemort grins with Harry’s face. He sees complete understanding dawn on Hermione’s face.

“You’re quite correct. You see why this would be troublesome if it got out, don’t you Ginevra?” he drawls, grimacing a bit. The redhead relaxes the tiniest bit, but stays in her defensive stance.

“It would only cause the entirety of the magical community to riot. What are you planning on doing?” Hermione asks sharply. Voldemort rubs at his brow.

“I need to go to the Ministry to pick up a prophecy that concerns the two of us, and it would be much easier to get it in Harry’s body than in my own, naturally. Additionally, I need to get to Malfoy Manor and make sure that the place hasn’t gone up in flames and that nobody does anything idiotic in my absence,” he informs her with a sigh. The three male Weasleys seem to catch up all at the same time.

“You’re You-Know-Who?” Ronald squeaks out, face going white.

“It’s the Dark Lordymort, Gred-”

“I think you’re right, Forge,” the twins say. Voldemort glares at them, and they grin in response.

“So, when are we heading to the Ministry then?” Hermione asks. He opens his mouth to tell them that he’ll be going alone but a raised eyebrow from the bushy-haired teen halts him.

“I am only allowing you and Ronald to accompany me. Any more would seem too conspicuous,” he gives in. Ronald pales, making his freckles stand out, while Hermione grins. The three other redheads pout.

“Fred, George, willing to cause a distraction?” Ronald says after a moment in which he seems to gain a bit of confidence. Ginny shoves him.

“I’m part of this too, you berk!” she snarls, running out of the room, hot on the heels of her older brothers who are doubtless starting to set up series of pranks. Voldemort stares at the door, horribly fascinated, while Ronald opens the trunk at the foot of the bed and pulls out a silvery cloak which he holds up. Hermione shuffles under it and disappears from view. There’s a faint boom, and the dilapidated townhouse shakes.

“Coming or not?” Ronald hisses. Voldemort ducks under the cloak, grimacing at the nearness of the two Gryffindors.

“Right. To the Floo, then,” Hermione declares, and they’re off.

* * *

Harry wakes up slowly in an unfamiliar bed and grins madly. As soon as he gets up and looks in the mirror he’ll know exactly who his soulmate is. He blinks open his eyes to a sight that he’s sure that he’s seen before. But where? He glances around and freezes at the sight of a snake — Nagini — curled up on the bed next to him. He lets out a mildly-hysterical laugh.

He’s only just woken up in the bedroom of Lord Voldemort, which he recognizes from the strange visions that he’s been having. He starts to sit up, which disrupts Nagini.

“Master? You smell… strange,” Nagini hisses, tilting her head as she stares at Harry. She bares her fangs threateningly when Harry laughs, slightly-hysterically, again.

“I’m not your Master, Nagini. I’m your Master’s soulmate, and it’s my birthday today,” he hisses in response. For a moment the snake does nothing. Then she’s butting her head softly into Harry’s shoulder.

“Master has complained many times about the lack of his switch. He will be happy. I will help you today until the switch reverses,” Nagini hisses gleefully. Harry gives the snake a ‘thank you’ and takes a moment to really take in the situation. He gets up, stumbling slightly at the increase in height, and summons a robe from the closet. It’s black. Voldemort wears black, right? He slips it on and glances in a mirror to see a reflection of Tom Riddle from the Chamber, but with give or take a decade or two more under his belt.

“Er, Nagini? Does your Master usually wear a glamour?” The snake laughs at him before bobbing her head up and down in an imitation of a nod. Harry grimaces and focuses on the image of Voldemort that he saw step out of the cauldron, and he opens his eyes again to see the more familiar version of Voldemort in the mirror. He grins.

“What’s on the schedule for today, dear Nagini?”

Sitting at the head of the table in the Malfoy dining room with the three of them, plus Pettigrew, cowering at the sight of him is the best birthday present he could wish for. It’s hilarious. Nagini, curled around his shoulders, won’t stop hissily giggling which isn’t helping in his bid to keep a straight face. He glares at Pettigrew a little more as he finishes his tea.

Standing suddenly, he watches as the four stand up after him a bow their heads a little.

“Wormtail,” he says, making it extra hissy, “come.” He knows Voldemort’s voice isn’t actually his real one. The Rat squeaks, and trembles as he follows him as he sweeps dramatically out of the room. It pays to observe Snape sometimes. They make it to the study where Harry sits down behind the desk and stares at the Rat, stroking Voldemort’s yew wand like the man is so prone to do. It’s lucky that their wands are brothers and that he can use it. He wonders what the man is doing right now. Hopefully he’s not murdering all of his friends.

“M-my Lord?” Pettigrew stutters, confused. Harry grins internally. He should send the Rat to the Ministry. Is Lucius Malfoy going to the Ministry today? Well, now he is. Before the Rat can think of running, Harry sends a spell at him that keeps him stuck in his Animagus form until the counter is cast. Then he stuns him and puts him in a Transfigured cage and calls for Lucius.

“Luciusss,” he hisses as the blond enters the study, who flinches slightly as he bows his head.

“My Lord,” he says clearly. Huh. Despite the multiple attempts on his life by the blond, Harry can’t hate the Malfoy patriarch. He’s only the epitome of a concerned parent, and Draco would be devastated if anything happened to him. 

“Go to the Minissstry and deliver thisss to Madame Bonesss,” Harry commands. Lucius blinks in surprise at the Rat in the cage.

“Of course, my Lord. Is that all?” the blond responds, freezing slightly after the words leave his mouth. Nagini pokes her head up to glare at him and the man swallows.

“You are lucky that I am in a good mood, Luciusss. Leave usss,” Harry hisses dangerously, narrowing his eyes in faux anger. The blond retreats rapidly. Harry lets out a breath he didn’t even realize he was holding once the door shuts.

“You are very good at acting, Master’s soulmate,” Nagini hisses, amused. Harry grins.

“I am, aren’t I?” He glances at the desk and sees a bunch of paperwork, which he elects to ignore. Voldemort can take a day off from looking at these documents if he has anything to say about it. He picks up a journal and flips through it, finding today’s date. The Death Eater meeting is at two, which gives him a few hours to think about how he’s going to handle it. 

He’s seen enough in his visions that he knows how the meetings tend to be handled. He’s not about to cast the Cruciatus, though. He skims through the papers and books in he office to find curses that are not as Dark as the Unforgivable, but still harmful enough to send a message. Nagini hisses suggestions and helps coach him through the wand movements.

“If you cast in Parseltongue, the minions will fear and not question you,” she hisses. Harry nods and starts practicing. An hour later he’s perfected a curse that makes you feel like you just got hit by a bolt of lightning, and another one that is essentially the Cruciatus curse but effects the mind rather than the body. He doesn’t particularly want to torture anyone, but a Death Eater meeting wouldn’t be a Death Eater meeting without a spot of torture. 

He sighs in anticipation as it grows nearer to the time that the meeting is scheduled for. Half an hour before Death Eaters are scheduled to arrive, Nagini pesters him into going into the meeting room. He sits in the chair and twirls Voldemort’s yew wand, waiting, Nagini curled up by his feet. It was good to go early. Nagini had to guide him around and he still managed to get lost twice. 

He barely stops himself from flinching when there’s a crack of Apparition from the entrance hall, and the Death Eaters begin to arrive. He watches in amusement as the grown adults get into their assigned positions, bickering slightly about who knows what. Fifteen minutes later, everyone has arrived, save Lucius. They bow.

“Rissse,” Harry drawls through Voldemort’s mouth. The Death Eaters rush to obey, and he has a hard time keeping his internal cackling from showing on his face. He thinks back to the notes.

“Master tends to hurt Malfoy, Dolohov, Avery, or the Rat,” Nagini hisses helpfully. Harry hides a smirk and a snort of laughter when a thought occurs to him.

“Look around, my friendsss. Isss someone missssing?” he says hissily. The Death Eaters pale collectively.

“L-Lucius, my Lord. And Wormtail,” one of them — Yaxley? — says, with confidence. Harry lets a malicious smirk grace Voldemort’s lips.

“You are correct, Yaxley,” he purrs, “Luciusss isss at the Minissstry on my ordersss, and Wormtail? Wormtail hasss proved to be a disssapointment. Lord Voldemort doesss not tolerate pathetic foolsss for too long,” he finishes threateningly, slowly sweeping his gaze across the room.

“Harry Potter is not to be touched,” he hisses decisively after a moment of silence, “I have uncovered information and my plans for the boy have changed.” 

“But, my Lord-” Harry cuts off the rest of the sentence with the lightning curse, done silently of course, leaving the man who decided to interrupt — Crabbe Sr. — screaming in pain.

“You dare to quessstion your Lord, Crabbe? You are lucky that I am in a generousss mood,” Harry snarls, leveling a sneer onto his face and standing tall. Nagini hisses in approval as the man whimpers.

The door to the meeting hall slams open, startling Harry into turning his full attention to the latecomer. It’s Harry Potter, Ron, and Mione, with Lucius Malfoy running in behind them. It’s strange to see himself from an outsider’s perspective. He raises a hand, and the room goes silent.

“My Lord, they requested to speak with you,” Lucius simpers. Harry narrows Voldemort’s eyes before turning to glare at the assembled Death Eaters.

“Disssmissssed. We will reconvene tomorrow,” he hisses dangerously. The men trickle out of the room until just Harry, Lucius, and the Golden-ish Trio remain. 

* * *

Voldemort sneers as Ronald and Hermione come through the Floo and into the Ministry of Magic behind him, stumbling slightly. He only waits a moment for them to reorient themselves before he’s striding off towards the check-in desk. The witch barely glances at them until she asks for names and purpose.

“Harry Potter,” Voldemort says smoothly. Hermione gives him a Look. Ronald covers his mouth to hide a snort of laughter at the way the witch’s expression changes to shock.

“Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley here. We heard that there might be a prophecy about Harry somewhere and we wanted to see if we could check it out,” Hermione says, tone slightly nervous. The witch just nods silently, eyes wide enough to resemble those of an owl, and waves them through. The second they’re out of hearing-range they stop.

“Really, Voldy? You should know by now that Harry hates the attention,” Hermione scold with a grin. Voldemort narrows his eyes at the nickname. Ronald breaks out into laughter.

“Imagine,” he wheezes, “imagine if Dumbledore had come by earlier to wish Harry a happy birthday?” the redhead finishes. Hermione snorts as they follow Voldemort into a lift. He shudders at the thought and pushes the button for floor 2.

“Lucky for him that he didn’t stop by,” Voldemort says darkly, before peering more closely at the passes. He smirks.

“That witch was so star-struck that she gave us all the highest-clearance passes. We can go anywhere we want within the Ministry,” he remarks. Hermione gapes slightly before shrugging.

“Where are we going, anyway?” she wonders, as the lift continues descending. Voldemort smiles and says nothing.

“Department of Mysteries,” Ronald says. At the incredulous looks of the other two, he sighs.

“My dad works in the Ministry. I know what’s on the different floors,” he clarifies, just as the lift comes to a screeching halt. They step out into a deathly silent hallway. Voldemort quirks an eyebrow.

“It’s Harry Potter day,” Ronald offers at seeing their baffled faces, “everyone’s off work.” He rolls his eyes and grins at Hermione, who is rubbing her temples. Voldemort withholds a huff and starts briskly walking down the hall. They get to a door, which he opens, the other two following behind him. 

Upon seeing that the room is full of more doors, Voldemort resists the urge to snarl in frustration. Hermione turns around and uses her wand to draw a big checkmark on the door that just closed behind them. Ronald grins.

“Brill, Mione,” he says, and then suddenly the room is spinning and they’re lucky that Hermione had the foresight to make the door distinguishable. Voldemort stares as he realizes that he has no idea where to go from here.

“We’re looking for a big room full of prophecies,” he mutters to himself, glaring at the doors as if they’ve insulted him. Ronald rolls his eyes and steps up to the nearest door before wrenching it open. There are a bunch of golden things inside, and a door on the opposite wall. Voldemort raises an eyebrow in curiosity and enters.

“Timeturners,” Hermione says thoughtfully. There’s a trunk full of them. Voldemort raises an eyebrow as he catches the way that Ronald gazes at the bushy-haired witch.

“Do you think anyone would notice if we filched a couple?” the redhead asks, picking one up to study it. Voldemort smirks. Hermione looks conflicted.

“I suppose it was very handy in third year,” she says with a sigh, reaching out and pocketing one. Ronald grins, grabbing one for himself. Voldemort takes two, deciding to puzzle over the girl’s statement later.

“Wicked,” the redhead says, “it was very rude of you to leave me behind, you know.” Voldemort heads off through the door as Hermione snorts.

“If you hadn’t gotten your leg broken you could have come with us. At least you didn’t have to come face to face with all those Dementors,” she retorts. Voldemort blinks.

“All those Dementors?” he questions, keeping his eyes peeled for the row that he’s looking for as he continues walking.

“Yeah, we were saving Sirius Black and all of the Dementors stationed at the school sensed him and tried to Kiss us,” she says casually. Voldemort frowns.

“There were at least 150 Dementors at the school, and yet you are not soulless husks,” he responds curiously.

“Harry drove them off with his Patronus,” the girl answers with a shrug. Voldemort falters as he steps forward, spotting the prophecy.

“You expect me to believe that Harry Potter can cast a Patronus, and he managed to drive off over 150 Dementors out for souls?” he says incredulously as he reaches up to grab onto the prophecy with his name on it. It buzzes happily in his hands. Both Gryffindors scoff.

“It’s Harry,” Ronald declares, “he didn’t get the highest score ever seen in the Defense OWL by failing at casting Defense spells,” he finishes with a snort. Hermione smacks the back of his head and Voldemort freezes in surprise.

“Fascinating,” he says after far too long of a pause. Ronald rolls his eyes.

“What’s next on the agenda?” Hermione asks as they start back the way they came. Voldemort frowns in thought.

“It is important that we find Lucius and get him to take us to Malfoy Manor. I am meant to be having a Death Eater meeting at two,” he drawls, and misses the glance between the two. They pass through the spinning room with ease thanks to Hermione’s brilliant thinking earlier, and the lift ride is uneventful. They slide back under the invisibility cloak as they leave the lift and start searching. Ronald spots him first.

“There he is!” he exclaims quietly, then frowns.

“Why is he holding a cage — no! Mione, that isn’t Scabbers, is it?” he breathes out. They shuffle closer to see better, and Hermione gasps slightly.

“You’re right,” she says slowly, eyes narrowed. Voldemort frowns.

“Shall we tail him?” Ronald says cheerily. Hermione nods. Both glance quickly to Voldemort who just starts walking under the cloak, forcing the two Gryffindors to follow lest they be revealed. They watch as the blond enters Madame Bones’ office, door closing behind him. He steps back out a few minutes later without the cage. Voldemort raises an eyebrow. They trail him until they reach an empty corridor.

“Mr. Malfoy!” Hermione calls out when she’s sure that they’re alone. Lucius freezes. He narrows his eyes when he turns around to see the deserted corridor. He’s about to turn around and leave when the trio step out from underneath the cloak. He wrinkles his nose in distaste.

“Ms. Granger, wasn’t it?” he sneers. Ronald bristles. Hermione shoves him. Voldemort looks on in amusement.

“We have something that we need to discuss with Voldemort,” she states simply. Lucius’ eyes widen.

“You… have something that you would like to discuss with the Dark Lord?” he repeats.

“I’m fairly confident that that is what she just said,” Voldemort drawls, cocking an eyebrow. Lucius is still standing frozen, staring at them.

“We haven’t got all day, you know,” Ronald adds, which shakes the blond into action.

“Very well, follow me,” he says sharply, then turns and hastens to the Apparition zone. He holds out an arm, and once he feels a hand latching on, he Disapparates from the Ministry to reappear in the entrance hall of Malfoy Manor. Ronald pulls off the cloak and stuffs it into a small bag, then holds out an arm for Hermione before turning to Voldemort with a grin.

“Lead the way,” he drawls to the bafflement of Lucius. The blond gapes when Voldemort proceeds to do just that. Ronald and Hermione snort as they leave him behind before his mind catches up and he rushes to follow them. He doesn’t make it in time to stop Voldemort from swinging open the doors to the ballroom. 

Voldemort stops in surprise at the scene in front on him. His snakelike self is standing tall over a trembling Crabbe Sr. with Nagini behind him hissing contentedly. The room explodes into noise, then cuts off as Harry raises a hand.

“My Lord, they requested to speak with you,” Lucius says, having hurried around the trio in his haste to explain. Voldemort watches Harry narrows his eyes before glaring at the Death Eaters.

“Disssmissssed. We will reconvene tomorrow,” he hisses dangerously. The men trickle out of the room until just Harry in Voldemort’s snakelike body, Lucius, and the Golden-ish Trio remain. 

* * *

Harry tilts his head very slightly in the direction of Lucius in a question.

“Do you care if he knows? He could be highly useful due to his influence at the Ministry,” Voldemort asks in parseltongue in response, through Harry’s mouth. Very strange. Nagini butts him with her head.

“The boy is your soulmate? Master, I told you not to hurt him from the beginning. I am a very smart snake, aren’t I?” she hisses grumpily. Harry grins, which makes Lucius and his friends tense, and gives Nagini a pat on the head. He holds out a hand towards Voldemort in a beckoning gesture, who smirks with Harry’s face and steps forward until the two are face to face. Well, face to chest, really.

“You know, Harry, I have been waiting my entire life to find my soulmate. I was beginning to think that I didn’t have one.” Voldemort pauses. “One of my goals throughout my lifetime has been to gain enough power so that once I met my soulmate I would be able to spoil them rotten. I know that we have many obstacles in front of us and behind, but would you allow me to take care of you?” he hisses, decidedly less confident.

Harry stares. The man who murdered his parents, who tosses out Unforgivables like candy, who has tried to kill him on multiple occasions, is asking permission to care for him. Harry blinks a few times through his shock. The Dursleys don’t care about him at all, the Weasley parents care but not quite enough to check up on him regularly during his hellish summers, Dumbledore — well, he left him at the Dursleys, didn’t he? Makes him go back every summer too. And he’s trying to force him to kill his soulmate.

Harry comes back to the present to see that his — Voldemort’s? — face is emotionless in the silence. It looks rather strange. He can see the fear of possibly losing the soulmate that he’s waited six decades for before he’s had a chance to try in his eyes. Harry nods decisively.

“Yes.” Voldemort smirks with Harry’s face, and Harry raises an eyebrow when he dispels the glamor making him look snakelike. He hears a sharp intake of breath from the Malfoy patriarch which quickly become the least of his concerns as Voldemort, still wearing Harry’s face, yanks him down to his eye level and kisses him soundly on the lips.

There’s a moment of disorientation as they both switch back into their normal bodies, Voldemort weaving an arm around his waist to keep him steady. ‘Fuck it,’ Harry thinks, and then throws his arms around the taller man’s neck, pressing himself deeper into the kiss. 

There’s a stream of water from a wand and Harry yelps, then turns to glower at the person who decided to interrupt. Lucius is staring in horror at Hermione, who’s standing in front of them with her hands on her hips.

“Before anyone decides to murder anyone else, I’d like to applaud Harry for his acting skills. You’ll be pleased to note that Voldy was not nearly as good at pretending to be you,” Ron declares with a wide grin, pulling their irritated glares away from Hermione.

“How did you manage to keep them from realizing the deception?” Voldemort asks curiously as he sits back down in the chair and gazes at his soulmate. Poor Lucius isn’t even trying to hide his confusion any longer. Harry shrugs.

“Nagini was really helpful. I know how you run your meetings seeing as I keep getting vision-thingies or whatever, so I just made my voice hissy and hit Crabbe Sr. with a lightning curse. Told them they were lucky that I was in a good mood and they were relieved enough not to question it,” he explains, “it was pretty fun, actually.” Lucius looks very pale.

“Harry deserves an Oscar,” Ron says seriously, and Harry grins.

“My Lord?” The shaky question draws everyone’s attention to the blond.

“Are you and Mr. Potter soulmates?” Lucius continues weakly. Voldemort smirks.

“We are, Lucius. I was very surprised to wake up this morning to find myself in Harry’s bedroom, especially six decades after my fifteenth birthday,” he drawls. Harry’s eyes widen. He chances a glance at Hermione who starts giggling, and he flushes. Merlin, the man has to be experienced. Hermione grabs Ron’s hand and turns to Lucius.

“If you could take us back to the Ministry, please?” she says with a blush. Ron grins cheekily, pulling out the cloak and tossing it in the direction of Harry, who tucks it away in his own bag.

“We expect him returned by eleven, Mr. Dark Lord,” Ron says pompously, and then he’s running out of the ballroom with a laugh as Harry sends a hex after him. Hermione rolls his eyes and follows Lucius after him, waving goodbye to Harry. The moment they’re alone, Harry finds himself with Voldemort’s full attention.

The man is watching him hungrily as he stands there in front of him. Taking a deep breath, Harry shoves away his nerves to clamber into Voldemort’s lap, straddling him. The man freezes, crimson eyes darkening in desire. Harry smirks as he finds himself gripped tightly by the hips.

“Poor Voldemort, waiting six decades for his soulmate,” he starts, trailing a finger down Voldemort’s chest before leaning in closer, “I’ve been waiting too,” he whispers. There’s a crack of Apparition and Harry blinks when he finds himself deposited on the Dark Lord’s bed. He grins at the older wizard’s expression of desire.

“Are you just going to stand there and stare, Vee?” Voldemort pounces.

* * *

Hours later finds Harry drifting off to sleep, sprawled across a couch with his head in his soulmate’s lap. Voldemort runs his fingers soothingly through his hair, removing his hand only occasionally to flip to the next the page of the book he’s reading.

“Vee?” his soulmate murmurs sleepily. The book disappears, allowing their eyes to meet.

“Yes darling?” Voldemort responds quietly, heart clenching at the reminder that he’s finally found his soulmate.

“How are we going to do this? With who we are and everything?” Harry says with a yawn, eyes pleading. Voldemort sighs.

“I am willing to change my approach to bettering the Wizarding World, as it is obvious that my current plans are not pleasing to you,” he says slowly, still playing with the boy’s dark hair. Harry freezes, green eyes widening.

“You would do that for me? To… to please me?” he whispers, hope and bewilderment flashing across his expression. Voldemort chuckles, then pulls Harry up until he’s straddling him again. He shakes his head gently.

“Darling, I will do everything in my power to please you.”

* * *

Harry stumbles through the Floo at exactly 10:59 with a blissful smile, only to come face to face with Sirius, who chokes upon seeing him. Hermione and Ron whip around to him, then gape.

“Looks like someone had a good time,” Sirius wheezes out after a few moments. Harry is about to ask what the hell he’s talking about when Hermione grins wickedly.

“It looks like you got attacked by a vacuum cleaner,” she gets out before dissolving into giggles. Sirius passes him a mirror. A quick glance makes Harry flush. Hermione’s description is very accurate, apart from the bite marks mixed in with the bruises. The click of the door opening has the four of them whirling around. Ginny and the twins step in, the twin’s eyes going wide while Ginny clasps her hands over her mouth to withhold her laughter.

“Harry, what are we going to do?” Hermione asks somewhat desperately, voice breaking through the noise easily. Harry sighs happily, a grin growing on his face.

“He told me that he’ll do anything to make me happy,” he says giddily. The four Weasley’s and Hermione can only gape. Sirius looks extremely confused.

“Bloody hell…” Ron whispers. Hermione beams.

“Will somebody tell me what in Merlin’s name is going on?” Sirius blurts out loudly, breaking the silence. Harry turns to his godfather, suddenly slightly nervous.

“I found my soulmate—”

“Obviously,” Sirius rolls his eyes.

“—and there won’t be another Wizarding War because my soulmate doesn’t want me to be upset and he knows that continuing the way he is will make me displeased,” Harry finishes. Sirius still looks confused, but now he’s thinking hard. A minute or two later his eyes widen.

“Your soulmate—” he cuts off.

“Is Voldemort, yeah,” Harry responds sheepishly, “he’s waited six decades to find me and will do anything so that I don’t leave him alone again.” Sirius stares before barking out a laugh.

“I need firewhiskey,” he mutters, “everyone, bed, now. We’ll continue this conversation tomorrow, don’t think we won’t.” Harry just laughs, feeling more alive than he ever has before, and slips up the stairs and into his bed.

He knows that this is the beginning of something huge, that everything will change, but it will be for the better. There’s someone there for him now, who’s vowed to do anything and everything to make him happy. The thought makes him giddy, and he falls asleep with a smile on his face.

* * *

Far away in Malfoy Manor, Voldemort sits at his desk and plans. Paperwork is everywhere to ensure a peaceful takeover of the Ministry, but he’s paying more attention at the moment to the small journal in his hands. The journal is full of gift ideas and date ideas and everything he can possibly think of to woo his soulmate the proper way. A glance at the clock shows that it’s midnight, and he puts down the journal reluctantly to get into bed. 

As much as he wants to just steal the green-eyed boy away, his desire to proceed properly is stronger. Tomorrow he’ll pay a visit to his little soulmate and his guardian. For now he will sleep, and dream of his darling until the next time they meet.

**Author's Note:**

> i’m alive i swear. this is the first harrymort fic that i’ve posted here but it will not be the last! i have so much more that i want to get out. 
> 
> yes, this is a one shot. for now. i might add a side story from someone else’s perspective later but this is it for now!
> 
> enjoy!!


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